Emily’s Smiles through Difficult Trials

Dawn sent an update last night, Sunday. Sorry it took a while to get published! Stephanie

I have been looking at the pictures for over a hour now and didn’t realize how late it was getting. I am so glad Jamie was able to retreive the information and pics. A big THANK YOU to JAMIE HOLLIS for all his time and work in bringing back the site again and keeping us connected. I know it takes alot of extra time in retreiving all the information and pictures.

July and August went by fast, we have had a good summer, difficult without Emily, but Trey has kept us busy. We have spent time at Myrtle Beach earlier in the summer and two weeks ago had a great trip to Busch Gardens in VA. Our first visit to Busch Gardens and Myrtle Waves at Myrtle Beach. This has been a special time for Trey, I think we have caught up what we missed the past two summers!! It’s just so hard not having Emily here with us.

Trey has kept busy with some extra school lessons with Ms. Holiday and Mrs. Schwartz in the mornings and football practice for the last 3 weeks, Monday - Friday in the evenings. I am keeping busy at the dentist office and Eddie at Lowes. Hope everyone has enjoyed their summer too!

This week has been tough , Emily could not wait for the month of August. She so loved to plan her birthday party. She would start in June getting ready, and talking about ideas, and visiting Party City for ideas. ” Mommy, you know I have to have alot of balloons, don’t forget the balloons” , she didn’t care about the cake or icecream as long as she had her plates and napkins picked out, and the color of her balloons. Yesterday, she had friends and family throughout the day visiting her grave and singing HAPPY BIRTHDAY. She had a cake, balloons, flowers, happy birthday flag and seashells placed around her. Trey thought the cake was real as we were driving up, he said “we forgot the plates”. Trey painted her a special angel. What a beautiful day. Of course my sign for this month, BUTTERFLIES were EVERYWHERE I went yesterday. At our home in the morning, when Trey had football weigh-in at the park in Wilmington, at my mom’s house, then back at home again and our visit with Emily at the church cemetery. All day long either looking through the windows of our home or outside walking, butterflies were all around. My friends have said the same, “Have you noticed all the butterflies?” I have not seen this many since Emily’s homecoming service. We all miss her so much, but this gave us a reminder that all is good, and she is looking down enjoying her day.

Monday we are going to Duke to take the gifts purchased from the memorial fund in memory of Emily. We wanted to do this for her Birthday and we thank everyone who contributed in her memory. Emily’s favorite items and games are being sent. These items will help during the long weeks in the hospital rooms. Well its midnight , I know I have left out a few things, I know Monday is going to be hard, going through those doors without Emily. Our “home away from home”. We had a whole seperate life at Duke for 2 years, just 5 months ago. It has been a big change for us getting back to the other. I will let you know about our visit.

Love, Dawn

Sorry this is so late folks! We’re doing some major work on the website. Be patient. Here is an update from Dawn about July 4. It was posted, then disappeared…..
Stephanie

Hope everyone had a great 4th of July! Trey enjoyed the camp provided through Hospice. There were ten in this class, and Trey opened up moe this week about Emily, even at home. He actually shared his story to the class first and Friday, the last day, when the parents were there for the last hour, he found it hard to even say anything about the week. I even had a hard time. Still so new for us. I knew he would have a hard time with the adults watching. He had a busy week, camp from 8:15am till 2:30 then Vacation Bible School at night. The VBS class Trey was in had at least 16 boys, if not more, and needless to say the loudest and most entertaining! The 3 girls decided to go to another class. Can’t blame them. All the classes had a wonderful time. Parents watched the kids perform on Friday night.

We had a 4th of July cookout at Stephanie’s office in Surf City on Thursday and watched the fireworks, just like last year. All I could think about was Emily, and what a great week we all had last year with family and friends at the beach house on Topsail. We had a whole week with no pokies and treatments. I can recall every day that week, what great memories. Trey misses her alot. He thinks and talks to her before he goes to sleep. Their rooms are side by side and every night they would talk to each other from their beds, then she would tell him, Trey, go to sleep now.

Monday and today, Trey worked with Grandaddy at the spec house building a fence around the backyard. He made a paycheck, so he can go to Myrtle Beach and play at Myrtle Waves. Tomorrow we are going to my uncle Jacks and Aunt Wanda’s beach house at Topsail , 1st and 2nd cousins will be there so it will be a fun day for Trey. I know Emily will be watching and playing too.

Thank you for the messages.
Love, Dawn

It has been six weeks since I have updated, and alot has been going on around here. Still do not sleep much, my body is so use to waking up at least every 2 hours, I , We think about Emily all the time. There is still so much I want to say, but find it more difficult and upsetting when I am on the computer for some reason. With my friends I am usually ok but when I am on this its harder. I guess due to the fact this was our biggest way of reaching out and where we connect to so many people. So many written out memories. Mornings and nights are still hard for me. I still have to have time by myself . It has been 8 weeks, but it still feels like it was yesterday. I just got my date book out, to look up something and even though at work the computer has the date right there, I realized it has been 2 months today. Then I knew what happened last night was my sign from Emily for this month at the same time she left us for heaven 8 weeks ago. Around 4:50 - 5:00 am, I just got up to get some water, and was thinking Eddie’s alarm clock is going off in 20 minutes, there is no way I will fall back asleep, then I heard , “Mommy”, just so clear and loud like she would call for me when she needed me in her room or woke up and I was not in there, the same tone that I always heard it. For a second I thought that it must be Trey dreaming outloud, calling me like he sometimes does in his sleep, but I got up and realized Trey was spending the night at Nana’s. I knew then that I was right, it was Emily! I went to her room, even though I didn’t see her, I just felt she was with me. I know it may sound a little strange but it was very real to me.

Got home around 8;00 tonight and shared all this with Eddie and Trey, and Trey said “maybe she will say something to me next time”. I told him “she will probably give you a big big kiss on your cheek”, and he smiled great big. On Monday, Trey will go to Camp Sunshine ( Lower Cape Fear Hospice & LifeCare Center ) for a week. There will be fun and creative activities which will provide a way for Trey to express himself along with other children his age that have gone through a similar loss in their life. He does well, and we continue to talk about past memories as if she is with us sometimes. Trey told me he has made a memory box and has different things in it that remind him of happy times and certain things they made together or bought when we were on vacation. He said whereever he goes he will always take that box.

Since May 7th last update, I made it through a tough Mother’s day on the 11th. On May 17th , The Tug Mcgraw Foundation invited us to Raleigh to see Tim Mcgraw in concert, and it was the best concert with the best seats!!! It was one month that night and there were two songs that really touched me especially when he was singing with the little girl on stage. He waved at Trey, and we really had a great time. Our church planted a tree in memory of Emily. We visit her at the church cemetery all the time, but I feel closest to her here at home, where we were with her in the final stages. Sometimes I find it hard to leave the house.

I started working a couple days the next week and then Trey had awards day and a class party on June 5th. I didn’t think I was going to get through this emotional day. Seeing Emily’s friends in the different 1st grade classes was smiles and tears. They all were so close. Emily’s 1st grade teachers, Mrs. Wortman and Mrs. Garrison had awards day after Trey’s third grade class . Emily’s teachers and 1st grade class presented us a beautiful plaque in Memory of our Little Angel with their class name, and a Teddy Bear that sat at Emily’s desk for the children to hug and ask questions if needed, about Emily. I actually made it up to the stage. This school year an Art award was given in Emily’s memory to a student in each of the classes 1st - 5th grades at NTES for their artistic skills. We will carry this on each year. A tree was planted by her 1st grade class in memory of Emily. It was a beautiful day!

We appreciate our church, school, and community support during these trials. Topsail Football camp started Monday June 9th for a week in the afternoon, Trey and his friends are getting ready for the football season! Topsail’s high school coaches and players taught them many drills and tips.

Father’s Day was a emotional day for me and I know for Eddie too. Last Saturday fishing offshore with Jeff P. in his boat. Trey wanting to catch a big one for Emily! I want everyone know how much we appreciate the cards, letters and messages you have sent. I have our cards out and read them over and over when I need comforting words and encouragement.

Love, Dawn

“What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly.”
~ Richard Bach